Monday, 3 November 2014
My December entertainments come with a seasonal sparkle - tinsel, candle-light and a Christmas rhyme or two, as well as the usual trappings - guitar, ukulele, some ranting and raving, a couple of anecdotes, and a bit of audience involvement in the middle...
Yes, I shall be requiring a little gardener-participation (a) to check you're still awake and (b) to check that you're true gardeners (which gives a hint as to the sort of involvement I shall be requiring). There will also be the odd - very odd - Triffid from my garden to send a shiver down the spine, unless, by some glorious and extraordinary chance, it's dead by then.
I still have some dates available in December, and beyond of course, and can confirm fee and other details on enquiry. I have one request though: if thinking of slotting some rhyme fun between other events at your Christmas social - supper, raffle, speeches, etc. - please bear in mind that I may be wilting by the time it gets to my turn, having watched you all guzzling the mince pies and mulled wine while sipping my sensible water for the past 3 hours, and therefore ask a little extra for long-drawn-out events. In fact, I advise against rhymes at the end of a long evening for your sake too. Although short and punchy, they take a little listening to. Have a look at my sample ones. You might need a swig or two to get through my ukulele efforts, though - I only know 3 chords.
Meanwhile, good luck with wrapping up those Christmas presents - that cursed garden fork, for instance! If it proves impossible, just make up a rhyme about it instead. That's what I do.
Happy gardening! (Or at least, green-bag-cramming.)
Rhymester for gardening clubs
Entertainment title: 'The Grim Side of Gardening'
Tel. 01446 (Vale of Glamorgan) 760124.